Fear is a very powerful emotion. At some point or the other, it has driven each one of us.
We are usually too scared to only lose something – loss of health, loss of loved ones, loss of finances, loss of beauty, etc. Moreover, the biggest fear that drives us, is the fear of being hurt, especially if we have experienced it in the past.
It’s not easy to let go of this emotion. But if we gather the courage, its doable. When I say courage, I don’t mean that we won’t feel scared, I mean that we do what we need to do anyway.
For eg: 12 years back, while working as a centre head with Reliance Infocomm, I was threatened by a client who had billing issues for his newly bought mobile. Those days Reliance had launched the 501 plan in which one had to pay only rs. 501 and it fetched them a handset on an interest free EMI along with a free bill plan. There was crazy chaos in the billing system and our centre was lined up with bill dispute customers everyday. It was during those days, that a few customers ended up threatening us, face to face at the centre.
One of the customers was so furious that he threatened to kidnap me. I was hell scared. I told my family about it and they tried their best to comfort me. However, I was still worried coming to work for a few days post that. Nothing really happened, but the stress it gave me, was bizarre.
The point is, I had to do what I had to do, keeping the fear aside. Even though I could not let go of the fear, I had to fulfill all my duties and responsibilities. And I did!
Fear pervails in all kinds of situations. Amonst many, I’d like to share another instance, a recent, different situation, where I had to fight my fear and do what was needed to be done.
This was when I had to speak to a large audience, after almost a 3-year break. I had lost my confidence big time. But there was this opportunity and I didn’t intend losing it.
I rehearsed and rehearsed and rehearsed. I took a deep breath and there I was, on the stage, with the mike in my hand. My legs were shivering and my trembling hands pulled my attention a million times a second. But Alas! I did it. What did I have to lose, even if I faultered? I would lose this opportunity. But that would anyway be lost if I did not attempt it. Here atleast I had a 50% chance of pulling it off. 20seconds on the stage and I started getting the grip.
Strenght is developed in situations when we think we can’t go on, but we keep going anyway. Ergo, we must know that there will be times which will make us scared, anxious, nervous and vulnerable. Yet, if we keep moving forward and show up, we will cross all barriers and reach where we wish to.
And once we know how to deal with our fears, we will forever feel free and liberated.
Deal with them one by one.
A very common and unknown fear is the ‘Fear of Death’. Whether we are rich or poor, beautiful or ugly, healthy or unhealthy, etc. We will die. We all are here to enjoy this journey of life and no matter what, we will wither off. Human species cannot live more than 100 years. Very few make it up to 102/103. So then, isn’t it better to be prepared to embrace what is real, instead of being confused with the worldly pleasures which will vanish sooner or later. The worst that can happen in any scenario will also end up in death and so will the best. Therefore, don’t attach too much to the best and don’t worry too much for the worst.
Another that tops the chart is, ‘Fear of Being Alone’- And so the question arises, ‘Weren’t we born alone?’ There is a reason behind it. The reason is, that we are created fully equipped to survive alone irrespective of any situation. Relationships only exist to enhance our journey on this planet. So if we are not charged up enough while sharing our life with someone, why can’t we sum up the courage to live alone?
Having said that, you must believe me, when I say, that ‘The creator never leaves us alone’. He keeps us around people who can uplift our souls and help us enjoy our journey. It’s just that, most of the times, we do not recognize them and keep running behind those, that attract the senses. However, beyond the stereotype, there exists connect and love. Nevertheless, nothing can compete with the love one must have for oneself. And if you haven’t fallen in love with yourself yet, it’s time to do that, to feel yourself in nothingness and experience the divine. It won’t happen at a click, because we all are a work in progress. Still, we need to start somewhere.
If you can deal with just these two fears, to start with, the rest will just be fine. And if you cannot do this, you must know that you are already dead… just that you ain’t aware yet..!